Hello Humans,
I feel like I've talked a lot about my life in this blog, but one thing I've stayed away from is my relationships as really there's not a lot to say about it, or what there is to say is slightly cringe-worthy and definitely embarrassing!
But I feel that for the first time in a while, I'm happy in my relationship status and so feel that I can write about if from an objective position. I've dated two people in my life, I know that some people by the age of 18 have had multiple-longlasting relationships, but I've dealt with so much that relationships were the least of my worries.
When I was fifteen I dated someone for just over a month, and at the time I really like him. It was an amazing summer and we made many memories I won't ever forget, but in retrospective, it was not a good relationship and I discovered that a few weeks after we broke up when I found out he spread vicious lies about me to people I had never met. I was devastated at the time, but I've moved on and although I wouldn't want to re-live it, I feel like it taught me a lot.
Then my relationship saga got a whole lot more complicated, as almost two years ago in March 2019 I realised I had feelings for one of my best friends. We flirted for months until we became 'official' two months later in May. We then began an 18-month journey of dating on and off. I never wanted to be someone who had an off and on relationship, but somehow I ended up enthralled in it before I had a chance to realise what it was.
We were together for most of 2020, despite being in lockdown, we called all the time and watched films over zoom together. It really did make lockdown so much easier, but then when the world opened again and I started my A-levels, then it got a bit trickier.
The week before we broke up from school for Christmas, we had a little argument and he ended up dating someone else two days later. I can't lie, I was devastated and for the first time in two years, I didn't speak to him for the best part of two weeks. It may sound trivial but we went from speaking every day to suddenly the only interaction we had was seeing each other's social media posts.
It was hard and I felt very alone, but then on New Years Day he messaged me about the Doctor Who special and we ended up talking all night- I'm really glad that we did because I did not want to spend my 18th not talking to him.
I think finally, however, I am happy being single and despite speculation that I am back with my ex, we're finally at a place wherein reality we're just good friends with a lot of love for each other. Right now I am focussing on my studies and not looking for a relationship, but if I was to stumble upon something then I wouldn't be opposed to a real relationship.
Maybe I'll wait until I'm at uni before looking to be with someone long-term. I'm happy with my friends and apart from the occasional flirtation with my ex, I really enjoy being single.
See you next time,
E x